18 Days Away from Him

18 days apart from him-- the longest ever. 18 days and now he's back in my arms. And I'm watching him with the same curious joy I had on the very first night he was born.

Is this little bundle truly mine? I touch his ears, and smell his hair, and my heart swells in gratitude that he's here. How am I so fortunate to be his mother, to be loved by him?

I don't know how I survived these last 18 days without him. It was awful. I missed him! I was sad. But now he's back and he's all mine, and I'm never letting go. Okay maybe in a few years. But not for a long time!

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My meds, my experience and my faith 💗

I'm not the most eloquent writer but I want to record my experiences and the meds I am taking. Meds and supplements to prevent a first time loss *Vitamin D due to my deficiency and like between low D and miscarriage * NO caffeine due to limited studies that show some people with caffeine sensitivity are prone to unexplained loss *Magnesium, by drinking Natural Calm, every morning - recommended by Dr. Sheri Hamersley *Progesterone 200 mg orally. I doubled up until 8 1/2 weeks to 400mg. *Lovenox 40 mg every night due to recommendation from Dr Hamersley *Vitafol OB prenatal with iron added *** Vitamin B6 and Unisom. I started this at around 8 weeks because of nausea. Meds I changed and added because of sub-chorionic hemorrhage *After every major bleed I take extra progesterone in the morning. * I had stopped the B6 at 13 weeks when my nausea subsided. I resumed it at 19 weeks to get to help my SCH heal *I take additional magnesium to calm my ...

Sam’s indominus rex

"sometimes he's sad, sometimes he's happy"

Never enough

I honestly wish people knew how hard it is for single parents to do basically anything. Getting out of the house, getting everyone to bed, getting free time to my own... all require a lot of coordination and there is NO backup. There is no one to fill in when I'm sick or to step up when I just need 5 minutes or to tell me I'm doing a good job when everyone's asleep and the house is so quiet. I feel like a failure in so many parts of my life; that I'm just not following up enough, I'm not doing enough, I'm not appreciative enough. It's just never enough. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Reflective Sarah

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